There comes a time, when you have made a commitment to write 500 words about something that happened in the course of your day, or something topical, when the inevitable happens. The day I have been dreading is the one where you find yourself with absolutely nothing to write about. Today is such a day, a day in which fuck all of any recordable merit has happened.

My day is divided into the two areas of my life; by day I have a ‘proper’ job at Nottingham Crown Court, something I’m not really supposed to talk about in great detail suffice to say that it is a job I enjoy doing. Once five o’clock comes round I go home and set about what I consider my real vocation, that of a writer and everything else. After picking the dog up from my dad’s and walking home I check my messages and have a shower before dinner. I might be going to a gig but just lately I have been too busy to do this as often as I once did or as often as I would like. After watching Eastenders I take myself up to the office and get on with whatever needs doing. At the moment I am still recording the audio book of Whatever Happened to Nathan McKenzie and am also at the finishing line. This project has been exhausting and although it will be nice to be able to stand back and admire my work once the thing is on the Internet, I can’t say I won’t be glad to have finished. The pressure to get several jobs done is something that weighs heavily on my shoulders until such time as I announce to myself ‘bollocks to this’ and procrastinate. This is when I panic even more at the amount of work I have to do, I still have two audio books to record before Christmas and then my work is done for this year (apart from the podcast which I will be sticking rigidly to), and I will be able to relax and pretend I am having a good time at Christmas.

I have already written out my list of projects that I want to tackle next year, and the thing that depresses me the most is the resemblance to the lists I have made every fucking year. Having been let down in the past by unreliable people getting in the way of my work, I now have the help of enthusiastic people who will hopefully help me to create the work that I want to do. Most of next year will be spent filming, although the music side of things is still sticking out like a sore thumb. Looking to the Post-It® notes on my wall I can see that some of these things can probably go in ‘the box’ until such time as I can afford/be arsed to make them a reality.

Can you believe I actually managed to write 500 words about nothing?

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