Rik Mayall is dead and Rolf
Harris is a predatory paedophile. June 2014 will be remembered for the death of
our childhoods. Imagine being six years old in school assembly and your
favourite teacher telling the whole room that Santa Claus wasn’t real, that’s
the level of destruction we’re dealing with.
I have said before that it is
a fixed point in our history that we used to watch Jim’ll Fix
It and want to be on it. We can’t rewrite the past; Saturday teatime
was Jim’ll Fix It time with the whole family.
Your letter was only the start of it
indeed; as we now know that a souvenir medallion wasn’t the only thing those
poor kids took away with them. A lot of them took an experience away that they
will never get over, especially (one can now imagine) on those ‘fix-its’ that
involved Gary Glitter or as we now know, Rolf Harris. As we grew older our
suspicions about Savile developed, we might not have immediately thought of him
as a paedophile, but we definitely found him a bit creepy. Especially when it
became public knowledge that we liked to shag dead bodies in the morgue of
hospitals he had free reign on. It came as no surprise when the ‘revelations’
first came to the surface, we all kind of knew by the time he died. The only
regrettable thing is that he was able to get away with it for so long thanks to
a combination of money, power, fame, police on the payroll, friends in high
places (Margaret Thatcher, another one known for fucking minors, see what I did
there? I know, different spelling but out loud that's a clever line) and charitable endeavours.
That’s the difference, we
might have watched his programme but we didn’t feel any affection towards
Savile. He wasn’t a loveable character like Rolf, who had been a part of
children’s entertainment for as long as we can remember. My memory of him
started with the BBC programme Cartoon Time,
which saw Harris in a white walled studio with an easel and marker pens as his
only props, used to draw a cartoon character before showing us a clip. I can
remember videoing the show and with heavy use of the pause button managing to draw
my own character.
Harris took his cartoon
drawing skills to ITV and rebooted the format as Rolf’s Cartoon Club (you can
join today) entering the computer age and now joined in the studio – ohdear –
by a team of school children. He gained a new generation of fans from the music
world as he somehow transformed himself from a novelty peddler of whimsical
ditty to Glastonbury acceptance, first in the Sunday afternoon irony slot and
then as a serious fixture on the festival circuit. Rolf-ed reworkings of ‘Stairway
To Heaven’ and ‘Bohemian Rhapsody’ came along, and he placed his feet firmly
under the daytime television table as the presenter of Animal
Hospital on BBC1 and later Animal Clinic
on Channel Five (yes, it still exists). His talents with a paintbrush also
helped him to find work on serious arts programmes, and a commission to paint
the Queen’s portrait. Do you remember how annoyed you were when Lenny Henry cut
short his rendition of ‘Two Little Boys’ at the Jubilee concert? How dare he
treat dear old national treasure Rolf in such a disrespectful manner!
Rolf Harris’s trial is the one
I’ve been keeping an eye on with the most interest. Nobody wanted to believe it
at first, but the longer the trial went on the worse it seemed to be looking
from his point of view. The fact that all of the allegations came from
unconnected women was the first sign that things were about to take a downward
turn. Once it was his turn to take the stand, it looked for a moment that it
could be starting to work in his favour. Asked by his defence barrister to briefly outline his career, it looked from the outside
like he could have won over the jury by reverting back to his recognisable
showbiz self; funny noises, an explanation of how he invented the wobble board
(an instrument that by connotation might never be heard again in the same way
unless someone is brave enough to try and claim it back for music) and a brief
burst of one of his popular hit records. A trial by jury isn’t a fool proof way
to go about things; it is essentially a popularity contest between prosecution
and
defence, with defence
saying he didn’t do it and prosecution saying he did. I’ve sat through a lot of
trials and I’m usually right in my guessing. The longer this trial went on the
more I became convinced of his guilt.
The police issued a picture of
his ‘mug shot’, without the glasses and cheeky smile the truest picture of Rolf
Harris was displayed for the world to see; a disgusting old pervert with a
history of sexual assaults against young women, girls in fact, one as young as
seven. Now that the trial is over we are allowed to know the things that
weren’t allowed to be reported on and the floodgates have burst open.
Inevitably perhaps, we learned that he was friendly with Jimmy Savile and used
to join him on noncey trips to Broadmoor. More stories will no doubt follow but
it hardly matters because the damage has been done. The public can now
speculate on who will be next to receive the knock on the door from Operation
Yewtree, the guessing game has replaced the New Year’s Day death sweep-stake.
===
My daily blog can be delivered straight to your Kindle
for 99p a month (link)
If you’ve enjoyed reading this, please consider
showing your appreciation by way of a donation using the PayPal button above
this blog. Every penny will be used to create free online content. There are
currently plans for a comedy sketch series, an online cookery and music show, a
video version of The Sunday Alternative and plenty
more including documentaries, short films and podcasts.
Listen to The Sunday Alternative
here.