I’ve never been particularly exercise crazy, but I do enjoy certain activities such as swimming and running. When I lived in Redcar I went through a brief phase of running along the beach but it didn’t last. With not doing the radio show on a Wednesday night anymore (for now at least), Mandi and I have decided to go swimming on that night. The trouble is the lack of decent swimming pools in Nottingham, the really good one in town (Victoria Leisure Centre) went through a modernization and I haven’t been back since. There is another one near us, a 1960s building but a nice pool that would remind you of the places you’d be taken to at school. We’ve decided to go to a newish one near us, even though I wasn’t impressed with it when it first opened a few years ago. During one school holiday we took Emily swimming at Djanogly Community Leisure Centre and I was appalled by the fact that there wasn’t a deep end. The water was the same depth for the whole pool, which was below my waist so useless for swimming in. As I can’t dive into the water I have to jump in the deep end to get it over with rather than climbing down the ladder and being put off by the cold. Apparently the lack of deep water is due to the fact that children were in the pool, and those three words that are slowly ruining this country, health and safety, is the reasoning. When I was a schoolboy there was an epidemic of swimming pool drowning as people under the age of sixteen, unable to touch the bottom of the pool with their feet, drowned.

It isn’t unrealistic to imagine that school swimming lessons no longer involve wearing your pyjamas and jumping in to rescue a rubber brick. The health and safety pillocks would hate that. Future generations will see an environmental problem of rivers and canals being rendered unusable due to a buildup of rubber bricks as there will be nobody capable of removing them.

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